Dating Wellness

How to Stay Happy, Even When You’re Feeling Lonely

You’re not alone, and you will be okay.

Feeling alone is one of the hardest things you have to overcome, but it’s all about your mindset. Loneliness can trigger other negative emotions, so you have to consciously make an effort to not succumb to this feeling. Here are some ways to happiness & feeling better:

Ask yourself why.

Becoming conscious of your behavior helps you identify the causes of your actions. We have to look for the answers within ourselves versus looking outwardly to solve our problems. Stop and think about why you’re doing what you’re doing. Is this a choice you’re proud of or a choice you keep regretting? Could your actions be consequences or results stemming from your loneliness? External forces can act as your crutches to help you get closer to your solution, but introspection will always lead you to the right path. 


Count your blessings.

Growing up, my mom always had one piece of solid advice –  “whenever you’re feeling down in life, always look at the people who don’t have as much as you do.” I swear I applied that to every single thing in my life, including my love life and how I would manage my situation when feeling extremely lonely. Mind you, this thought process came in my later years – after a lot of heartbreaks and ups and downs. But better late than never – I’m so glad I resorted to my mom’s words. This is my best piece of advice for you too – feeling lonely is a lot better than being heartbroken; feeling alone is a lot better than feeling lonely in a relationship.


It’s better to be alone than in a toxic relationship.

Take a moment to think about how tough your life would be if you were to be with the wrong person. Loneliness can cloud our judgement and lead us down the wrong path. For that reason, gratitude is my single medicine in this sort of situation. Most of the time, we hear that ‘gratitude is the key to happiness,’ but gratitude has healing powers too, especially when it comes to loneliness. 


Surround yourself with people that uplift you. 

When we are lonely, we tend to make rash decisions and compromise on the things we want in a partner and in a relationship. As cliche as it sounds, surrounding yourself with the right people can have a huge impact on your moods and outlook on life. The right people in our lives help us see our worth, bring up our self-esteem, and ultimately help decide how we want to be treated by our potential partner.


Stop feeling sorry for yourself. 

Immerse yourself in your craft and in your hobbies. Allow yourself to feel the emotions of being lonely, but don’t sulk and drown in them. Don’t feel sorry for yourself, and appreciate the many amazing things that are going right for you. A tangible strategy to save yourself from getting swept away by negative emotions caused by loneliness is to put a time limit on how long you stay down. It’s important to feel, but don’t let it consume you and run your day or your week. At the end of the day, you have to move on.


Focus on what you enjoy doing for yourself, not anyone else. 

Focus on doing things that you love to do. By focusing on your hobbies and doing the things you love, you will be happier knowing that you are doing them for yourself, and no one can take these positive feelings away from you. After all, self love is a #majorkey to happiness. 


Don’t ignore your emotions. 

Accept your emotions and loneliness as is, and respect and honor whatever you’re feeling. The more you try to ignore or brush off the feelings, the bigger that emotion will become


Loneliness is not easy, and that is a given. But instead of falling victim to it, use it as a time to fill your life with love from within & gratitude for everything that you already have and wisdom for what’s yet to come.


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